happy holidays​/​am i stressing you out?

by Wayne Jetski

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released October 7, 2015




Wayne Jetski Sacramento, California

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Track Name: are you feeling better?
its been five nights and four days and now i drive a new car and i wear new frames and you wept as you said you were making a mistake and you politely asked if i could go away and i said sweetie things are going oh so great and you politely asked if i could stay away and so i made five dates with five white coats and i swallowed that lump inside of my throat and i wait and i wait for the day you feel a little better, tell me are you feeling better im not feeling any better why dont you want to be together is being alone really that much better?
Track Name: in front of your friends
now my stomach is getting weak from the medicine and i like eating indian food i dont want to ever visit eroupe if i dont get to kiss on now. and now my stomach is getting weak from the Vicodin and i like eating indian food, i dont mind if laura comes too as long as i get to sit next to you. and if its alright with you i would like to call you sweetie infront of your friends. now my stomach is getting weak from myself again and i cant stomach hardly any fucking food but if youd swing by im sure we can grab something i always feel just fine whenever im with you
Track Name: labor day knife fight
and its true what they say that the sunshine comes with a promise but its only the promise of repetition, scratching and itching, shooting and missing wishing and wishing again. and now so it seems youre a lovely tapestry woven from perfectly inaccurate memories of a lover now gone, but the big show goes on, it goes on and on, and on and on. and thats how i won this years labor day knife fight, it was easy, i thought of you and i didnt even try, baby norah cried, dustin and i promptly went outside and i apologized for taking my little slice of life, and later on on that same day i burnt a flag and i burt my hand, it made me think all about you oh sweetie fox i swear its true i burnt my hand on you, and if i could again i would but i know that you dont want me to.
that night when you finally got your drunk call, i thought that id apologize for my home made deathmask, fastend from a half a dozen grocery outlet shopping bags, i wrote a note that was just for show as i intentionally left your name out, when everyone already knows youre all i can think about
Track Name: i love you new york
i always wanted to go to new york, never thought i would go, turns out its easy, new york found me and i never wanted to go home.
i always wanted to stay in new york, i said i like this can it be my home, i always wanted to stay in new york and i never wanted to go.
new york am i stressing you out?
i never wanted to go back home, i thought you said i could stay
new york am i stressing you out?
i can see clear now that youve held your doubts.
Track Name: trying to learn to want to swim
i fancied you a messiah for a skinny mother fucker wearing faded skinny jeans, now look at fancy little me, oh i floss between my teeth, and i fold my fancy twin sized sheets, and i have fancy dreams, of choking fancy at the beach.
on tuesday i am going in for help and god i sure hope these white coats can help
its not that i dont think that i cant pick myself up if youre not around, oh i know now, without a doubt in due time ill be fine, but tell me why would i care to try to pick myself up if youre not around, and im equally uncomfortable in the air and on the ground, and i know youre right, its no way to live a life, and i need help, and you youre always right, so im trying to learn to want to swim, instead of just sinking and floating away but only because i know now that you wont come around until i learn to pick myself up off the ground.
Track Name: happy holidays
it was cold outside and we took my car, drove down south to the old empire, caught the last half of the show, i bragged said the drummer is a guy i know, and when we got lost on the drive home we starred at christmas lights and i knew you were the one, and when we pulled in your parking lot we sat in my car and talked. later you would come to try and explain how you didnt want to go, id say i felt the same, and while you were home for winter break i tried to think of how to fix this great mistake, and when you came home everything was great, but this time youre not on wintner break, youre seven measly miles away, and thats how youd like things to stay.
Track Name: opus tea and free magik
puffing weed all in the rabbits face, like its no big deal, tomorrow morning you are going back to benicia. trying to enjoy opus tea and free magik, what you say next so typical, so tragic.
remember when you said it faded?
because i do
now im feeling awfully certain no one wants to fuck me, now im feeling goddamn certain no one wants to stick around, but that dont bother me at all because its hard enough lying next to you, all i ever cared to do was lie down next to you.
all my early work consists of arson threats and im not done yet, ill take LAX and san franciscos next, what did you expect but recycled text for recycled events
and ill burn down LAX and all its fashion
youll fly in airplanes and flap their wings , fall into the oceans never to be seen.
and if you came back would it be the same, would you promise that youd stay, would it be the same? i think so, in the sense youd go away.
and every day is all the same i learn to stare at a dozen paper cranes, pick and scratch my people brain, slip insane just trying to explain.

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